Last year, before I went quiet, I wrote about the Ziegarnik Effect, or our desire as human beings to complete unresolved tasks, to close loops.
One year later, and turning 35, I can still see plenty of evidence to support it. I happily got vaccinated against coronavirus. I returned to jiu-jitsu and the gym and seeing my family and friends without worrying I'd be contagious. The company I work for got acquired. Another company I worked for went public. My brother got engaged. My best friend moved to Texas. I started dating again. And I'm still flipping toys on eBay.
What's the plan for this 35th year around the Sun?
Well, I still have plenty of things I want to do. Thank god. And turning one year older is a great opportunity to bring my attention back. To exhale the troubles of the world and the habits I didn't know I didn't need and start fresh.
One thing I didn't do much of in my 34th year was write. As a matter of fact, I didn't write any weekly emails here at all. Funny how life can fly by.
Initially, I took the time away to work on my business. And while I'm still doing that, I'm waking up to the need to write again. In one of the best books I ever read on writing and life, Bird by Bird, author Anne Lammott said, "Becoming a writer is about becoming conscious." How could I not use more of that?
Lammott also writes, "You look up and stare out the window again, but this time you are drumming your fingers on the desk, and you don’t care about those first three pages; those you will throw out, those you needed to write to get to that fourth page, to get to that one long paragraph that was what you had in mind when you started, only you didn’t know that, couldn’t know that until you got to it."
Maybe I needed to take time off, maybe I didn't. But here we are with a new chapter and I'm ready.
And, naturally, as consciousness-seeking goes, I always end up back at the ultimate question - What are we all doing here?
Neuroscientist Andrew Huberman tried to describe how he saw the meaning of life on the Lex Fridman podcast. He noted that human beings have been able to find significance in the depths of space or from the dirt floor of a jail cell. Astronauts have experienced the Overview effect, a shift in consciousness while flying outside the Earth's grasp, while historical figures like Viktor Frankl and Nelson Mandela have found purpose in the absolute worst of conditions. Huberman concludes that it could very well be that our purpose in this universe is to travel that ladder of consciousness, gathering wisdom from the big picture and the immediate present, going back and forth as often as we can.
With all that being said, turning one year older doesn't automatically bring some revelation. Tomorrow won't be wildly different from today. It's the slow accumulation of it all. You have tons of chances to step back, reflect, and move forward. I have plenty of aspirations and I have some writing to do. I want my 35th year to be more curious, more generous, and more patient. And it all begins now.
Thanks for reading,
Dan